When uncertainties keep circling the head, in the end, nothing matters. Just the guilt. Guilt that somehow strangles within the self, like its screaming but feels reckless. Because theres no way out, trapped inside the guilt forever.
Would you please, at least show me something?
I've had enough.
I knew, it meant something. It really did. I just dont know what God is trying to show me now. I even have doubts, astghfirullah. But I have to make a shield, a protection, all these dark thoughts from penetrating into the cold veins.
I tried everything, to avoid from being possesed by this feeling, I tried really hard. I guess sometimes we tend to lose to our own dark side.
Oh Allah. Guide me. I'm clueless, restless. I need to act but I dont know where to start. I'm scared that it will destroy my own self. My faith. Im petrified that the outcome will be nothing. I dont think I'm strong enough to accept it.
Pray and hoping Allah would show me something.
Currently lost..in a midst of confusion.
In the end maybe.....
"Not everyone is meant to be in future. Some are just passing through to teach you lessons in life"
Two words : Thank you.
"One day, you'll be just plain and timeless memory for some people. Do your best to be a good one"
InsyaAllah, I will.
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If that is the answer, I would need countless/endless of REDHA+PASRAH after this.
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Dearest to self, let it go.
Give up the creation for the Creator, and see what He gives you in return.
"And if any one puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is (Allah) for him." [Surah Talaq]
Grant me something better. or let it be just you. Amin ya Rabbal alamin.
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